Guest Post: Jeremy C. Shipp

Today I ask author Jeremy C. Shipp 5 Weird Questions.  His latest book is Monstrosities, a short story collection.  Check out his website at

1 — Pick two literary characters to be your parents.  Who do you choose?

Jane Eyre and Hagrid.  Hagrid would inspire me to lighten up and live a little.  He would teach me to respect life (and monsters).  And as for Jane, I would look up to her imagination, her compassion, her spirituality.  She would instill in me the strength to stay true to who I am.

2 — Make up a holiday from scratch.  How would people celebrate this day?

On Attic Clown Day, we juggle balloon animals full of blood while riding unicycles.  Whenever someone drops a blood balloon, we’re required to laugh.  Whenever someone doesn’t drop a blood balloon, we’re required to laugh.  All day we eat nothing but cotton candy full of spiders, and rubber chicken noodle soup.

3 — How much deeper would the oceans be without sponges?

Sponges are always interrupting intellectual and philosophical conversations.  So without them, the oceans would be much deeper indeed.

4 — If you could get rid of any state, which one would you pick and why?

I would get rid of the state of selfishness, which would hopefully increase compassion and empathy for the poor and underprivileged.  Also, I would get rid of South Dakota.  Who needs it?

5 — Given the opportunity, would you be willing to swap gender for a week?

Definitely!  I would dress up like Blossom and do lady stuff, like drinking tea or fighting zombies or solving math equations.

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